One of the most practical ways to demonstrate what is meant by this title “rejection syndrome” is in how people often behave after a long term relationship ends in rejection.  Typically the person that has been rejected can & does respond in several ways:

1. Deep depression & resentment
2. Vindictiveness
3. Licentious liberation

This is also how people often behave when they have been rejected by their long term relationship with a part of the Church.  How often have you heard a person who was kicked out of a church due to doctrinal differences, go through some or all of the 3 phases listed above?

Just as in the practical relationship, a rejected Christian may start out depressed & blaming then perhaps move to vindictiveness or revenge against the rejecters & perhaps eventually even displaying wanton rebellion not against the rejecters but against anything that appears stable, “institutional” which is just another way to breakdown the “long term” aspect of relationship.  How often have you seen a divorced person go on to be a very promiscuous person, though that behavior was never characteristic of the person even before they were married?

I am writing about this because I see so many people in my own theological circle going through this “syndrome”.  I know “laymen” who have been rejected & kicked out of churches over doctrine issues.  I know “pastors” who have lost their position over doctrine issues.  Many of these people display the signs of the rejection syndrome.  They are promiscuously willing to accept anything & everything – because since they were rejected they don’t want to reject anything.  They display this mentality under the guise of “open-mindedness” but it seems their minds are so open that their brains are ready to fall out on the floor.  The solution is NOT to downplay doctrines, but it is to solidify our relationship with Christ.

Over the last couple of years, I’ve been trying to self-assess if perhaps I have succumbed to the Rejection Syndrome – for I too was rejected not by one, but two congregations; One for my adherence to Reformed theology & the other for my open disagreement with a “pastor” about his authority.  Neither experience was I rude or unkind.  (Read more about that here).  Becoming aware of this Rejection Syndrome & how others are being affected by it, even as they use reasoning like, “Hey, we’re called heretics by others so how dare we consider anything else to be heresy” I am leery about showing resentment, vindictiveness, & certainly liberty. So many of these folks seem to be on a downward slide.  They pretend to care about doctrine but have all but chucked doctrine & replaced it with this promiscuous “acceptance” of anything & everything.  They speak of non-Christians as being more loving, more “Christ-like” than Christians.  They are content to battle against “fundamentalists” but give a pass to liberals who are constantly trying to dismantle the Bible.  They speak piously as if they alone understand the true righteousness is in Christ & that everyone else that dare impose on them is merely a “legalist”, a "slanderer", or a “Pharisee”.

I don’t want to become afflicted with the Rejection Syndrome.

I want to be able stand upon the shoulders of those who came before.  I want to be able to acknowledge the contributions from the saints throughout time.  I don’t want to constantly be telling people they have “given me something to ponder” as if I am stuck in the flux of a “short term relationship”. That is another sign of being afflicted by Rejection Syndrome – never being able or willing to resolve or commit to anything.

As I go forward with my long term relationship with Christ – my eternal relationship with Christ, I want to build the bonds of that relationship. I want to know more & more about Christ.  I don’t want to minimize any aspect of that relationship.  My relationship with Christ is not a nebulous, short term, uncommitted relationship with no bounds – but is a structured, focused, long term, eternal life that I plan to enjoy & grow in.

It is my desire that fellow Christians will also develop this long term relationship with the Lord & in that way, as we come together our doctrines will not be our own but they will be the very mind of Christ working in us.  We will be unified not in merely “friendships” & commonalities but we shall be unified in Christ & His will, His glory.